Sunday, February 14, 2010

The services

I'll start with Friday's burial service. My in-laws picked us up and I was fine during the car ride to the cemetery. When we started getting closer I could feel the tears starting. Then I saw the tent that was up and I lost it. I've always hated seeing the tents because I knew someone was being buried and when I saw it up for Aidan it was 10 times worse.

There were 4 chairs sitting in front of his little casket. Chris and I were lead to the chairs before the rest of the family so that we could have some alone time. I once again started talking to Aidan like it was the most normal thing to do. For me it is though, I talk to him every morning and every night. It feels right to me and that's what important. The funeral director said that he normally doesn't do it, but offered to let us put two roses in Aidan's casket. We accepted and I held my breath while he opened the casket. I was sure that seeing Aidan in the hospital would be the last time I saw him so I was nervous. When it was open and I saw my little boy it put a smile on my face. He was wearing a very sweet elephant outfit and wrapped up in a blanket.

The service was about 10 minutes long and after wards we went to my in-laws because I didn't want to be alone.

Saturday's service was hard for me. I've kept myself pretty secluded since we found out the severity of the bleed in Aidan's head. I kept people out of the hospital and I haven't seen people since Aidan was 2 days old. I also haven't shown very many pictures of Aidan and I had a few there and it made me nervous. There were so many people there to support us and it was amazing. Most of those people were there because they love us, but most importantly they all love Aidan even though they didn't get to meet him. Aidan really did touch many lives and helped rebuild bridges to a few relationships. Our best friends from Ohio came and of course they brought their 4 month old, Bryson. Seeing Bryson helped me so much and while it was bitter sweet to meet him this way I'm so happy that they could come.

The service lasted about 30 minutes and was perfect. Aidan's name was said a bunch and that makes me so happy. After the service a small group of us went to the cemetery and then to my in-laws. It was really nice to spend that time with friends and family. After everyone left I was talking to Chris and his parents and I told them that since the services are over that I'm afraid people are going to forget Aidan. I was reminded that I talk about him all the time and that will prevent people from forgetting about him. Chris also reminded me that all of my plans for donations, volunteering and fundraisers for the March of Dimes in Aidan's name will make sure the his name is said forever.

Thank you to all of our friends and family for all of your support. We still need it and I know that we will get it unconditionally. We love you so much for that!

I love you Aidan Christopher!



  1. I worried too that people would forget Nolan, but to this day (8 months later)... my friends and family and even complete strangers as in blog readers have reminded me daily in one way or another that they think about him. I am hopeful that this will be the same for you.
    Many prayers Maggie, I am here if you need to talk any time and any day.

  2. Maggie,

    We will never forget Aidan.


  3. i know the feeling of wanting people to remember. i bring up max randomly in conversation.. and sometimes it makes people uncomfortable, but mostly it's reassuring to me and to them that he was here, and he was a part of our lives and how much he meant.. just in a random conversation. you'll get to that point too... where you don't have to be talking about him specifically to bring him up.
    i understand your hesitation with the pictures... but sharing those with people that love you and love aidan will only help to reinforce his life... and love... when you're ready. just this past october (he died in july of '08) i sat down with some dear friends i hadn't seen in about a year and we went through max's "box".. where i have his hand and footprints, all his pictures, the outfit he wore, and the tear bottle i got right after we lost him. it was so wonderful to go through it and share him with those close to me... and just cry a little, and smile and laugh.. and miss him- but be ok.
    i pray daily for you all to have peace.

  4. Maggie,

    I PROMISE you that we will never forget Aidan.

  5. We will never forget Aidan, Maggie. He has touched many many lives, even several here in California.

  6. Hi Maggie. I found your blog through the bump, and I've commented on a couple of your posts there. I just want to tell you how amazing your strength has been through this whole thing. Aiden will NEVER be forgotten. I can tell just from the posts that I've read here that you guys will never allow that to happen. It was/is one of my biggest fears about Olivia too. I am praying for you guys. :)