Wednesday, August 29, 2012

I have a badge!

I'm now officially a volunteer with Open Arms! I'm overly excited about the fact that I have a badge now. :-) I'm so happy (odd word in this situation) that I'm more available to loss families now. If they want to talk to a mom that's been there, I'm able to go right to them. I'm also able to help out "behind the scenes" with my bereavement coordinator. 

It means a lot to me that I'm able to take our tragic loss and turn and help someone during their tragic loss. Aidan taught me a lot and he will continue to help me grow during my grief journey. There are times that it still shocks me that I'm a loss mom. Before it made me mad that I kept having those shocking moments, but now they are a reminder of my little boy and of where I'm at.

ABC is coming along nicely too. We've got about 85 books (which will go fast once the program starts) the library cart is being painted and word is getting out in the community. It's amazing that my little boy's name is being said by so many people. I'm truly so incredibly happy where my life is right now. I, of course, would rather have Aidan here with me, but I can't so I'm making the best of it. I finally have a passion, a drive for helping other loss families and getting Aidan's Book Corner going. It's a great feeling.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander.


Sunday, August 12, 2012

State Fair

Picture is from here

We took Lucas to the state fair yesterday. 

I think his favorite part was the train ride down there.
 Once we were on the train he was a happy camper, but when the whistle was blowing he was terrified. He practically jumped out of Chris' arms to get to mine.
He stood, waved and said bye bye to every tree branch that we passed.

The lady sitting across from us kept commenting on how tired he would be. That he was. He slept through a lot of the fair.

We had awesome weather for our trip. It was in the upper 70's and the sun was shining. I didn't take any other pictures while we were there because it would have just been a lot of the same picture up there. We did see the world's largest boar and a couple of pigs with their piglets. We also saw a lot of cows. Lucas had some of our old fashion root beer float. It was his first taste of soda. We don't plan on letting him have soda until he's much older so this was a special treat for him.
Snack time
What I love about the fair is that we were able to bring in our own food and drinks. Lucas is very picky on what he'll eat so I was nervous he wouldn't eat. Well he did snack on his "swim swims" (that's what momo calls goldfish) a Gerber pouch of veggies and some applesauce. It was nice to not spend money on food that we'd just throw out due to desperation to get him to eat.
Lucas was a little less excited for the train ride home. He was very very sleepy.

As soon as we walked in the door, we went right upstairs to take a family nap before going out to dinner with friends. I'm so glad we went to the fair. It was awesome spending time together with no tv and essentially no phones, except to take pictures. Looking forward to next years fair.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander!


Wednesday, August 1, 2012

More on ABC

It's official! Here's our logo! I love it! I'm so thankful that my friend and fellow BLM was able to help design this with me. Things are really taking off with ABC and it's overwhelming. The support that I'm receiving all over the country is amazing! There are other times that it's overwhelming because I think wow, all of this is because of my baby. It's like I get hit over again that we lost a baby. It's an odd feeling. I'm also making sure that setting this up and running it doesn't take away my time with Lucas. I want him to grow up with the desire to help others and to volunteer so I hope this helps him. I just have to make sure that he doesn't feel like 2nd best or trying to compete with Aidan for my attention. I know that whenever we have another kid there will be competition.

I'm looking forward to going back to the NICU again with Susan before I start volunteering up there. If it's possible, I would like to go into Aidan's room as long as there isn't another baby in there. That way if I have a family in *his* room, I won't associate it with that being his room. 

I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander!