Friday, January 28, 2011

Can you feel the love tonight

Most people know that my all time favorite movie is the Lion King so it shouldn't be surprised that this song is in my head. Well let me tell you, I'm feeling the love.

My department through me a baby shower today. They got us a gift card to Babies R Us and we're having food all day. My cubicle is very decorated and I love it. I love being the center of attention and every person that walks by stops to comment. It was a total surprise! It makes me feel loved and that Nugget is too. I know he is and I didn't need a party to know that, but it's the reassurance that's nice. I don't know how to describe it. Kind of a coincidence...I decided to wear the shirt that I bought for Aidan's shower today.

So thank you co-workers from the bottom of my heart. Now I must eat my blue and pink cupcakes to get a beautiful purple mouth. :-D

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget!

Monday, January 24, 2011


Baby’s senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, those tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, baby can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing your lullabies! Growth (at least inside your womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month.  

So Nuggy has moved down a little. He hasn't completely dropped, but enough that I can breath. I'm feeling pretty good, sore, but good.  Chris is having a great time laughing at me when I try to get up, sit down, roll over, so pretty much anything. My shower is this Saturday and I'm so excited! We've started getting package in the mail and it's making everything so real. The nursery basically is done except for hanging up a few things. Hopefully we get that done in 2 weeks. I have an u/s and NST today and I have a feeling that he'll pass with flying colors because he's been non-stop this morning. Well except for when I stand up.

I'm doing much better emotionally after posting my last blog. The posting and the comments have helped so much so thank you! 

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget!

34w1d<------28 days to go!

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Time to be honest

I have poured my heart and soul into this blog. I've put my emotions out there because it helps me and I like to think that it's helping others too. Well I've been keeping something from you. I haven't been doing so well emotionally. I've been crying a lot more. I know that it's been a mixture of hormones and grieving. Aidan's birthday is in less than 2 weeks and it's been hard. I've been looking for stuff to get ready for Nugget and I find all these things that I wish I could buy for Aidan too. I feel guilty for being so excited for Nugget and I feel so guilty for being so sad about Aidan. I feel like I'm cheating both of them.

I've talked with Dr. B, my support group and Chris and am feeling better now, but I was bad. I had an amazing conversation with Stephanie and she really helped to open my eyes and know that I am and will be a great mom. I will always carry Aidan and care for him by continuing to tell story and I will be taking care of Nugget with a much greater appreciation.

To all the baby loss moms out there, be honest with your feelings because this pregnant after a loss thing is hard. Remember that you will never replace your lost child and that your baby is watching over you from Heaven.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget


Saturday, January 15, 2011

Nugget's room-in progress

It's still a work in progress, but here's what we have so far.

We love the bedding so much!

We're going to buy some shelves today and make one of those dedicated to Aidan. I'm so excited to set it up and then show it to you! We're also hoping to buy a new dresser today.

36 more days!
I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Nugget is so my kid!

For those who know me, I like being the center of attention. Not all the time, but most of the time. lol I'm loud and can be down right annoying. Well apparently Nugget likes the attention too.  On Monday I had my regular NST and guess who slept through the whole thing. Yeah, Mr. Nugget was not interested in waking up.  He was moving, but it was more sleep moving. They just felt different.  I tried bribing him with seeing his daddy, well hearing him, Arby's or Subway. None of that worked. The nurse came in after taking the results to the on-call dr and said I was heading to L&D. I knew I was because it was already 5:30 and the office closes at 4:45. BUT I wasn't even called back for my NST until 4:50 and my appointment was at 4:30. I digress. 

The nurse explained everything to me and I was very calm. I called Chris and told him to head to the hospital. I was hooked up to the monitors and an hour and a half later was told to go home because he looked perfect.  The nurse and I were joking around about how the hospital was my second home and that I could practically set up the NST myself. I was so much more calm this time since everything had been explained to me. So now I have to drink juice while I'm in the waiting room to make sure he's awake for the test.  

Oh and he has been "paying me back" since by kicking the snot out of me. I love the reassurance and it makes my 6-12 movements in an hour go quickly since he usually hits that within 10 minutes. So now we know, Nugget is going to like getting attention.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nuggy!


Sunday, January 9, 2011

11 months


Wow baby boy, I can't believe it's been 11 months since we said goodbye. I'm sitting here looking at your pictures just wanting so badly to go back in time to hold you one more time, tell you I love you one more time and kiss you one more time.  But I can't do that, so here I sit, staring at your pictures.  To say that I miss you is an understatement, I can't even think of a word that would give justice to how I feel. 

Daddy and I found the first personalized thing at the store with your name, spelled correctly. We found a little snowman ornament and had to buy it. Then when momo and I were in the gift shop of the State Museum I found a little stocking with your name on it. We've found items before, but they were all spelled Aiden and it would be kinda tacky to buy something with your name misspelled. :-) I asked Uncle Scott to keep an eye out for them when he's on the road.

Mommy and daddy are getting excited about welcoming Nugget into the world in 42 days, but not a single days goes by where I don't wish that you were here getting ready to welcome him too.  We have big plans for him to always know about his big brother Aidan.

I love you so much sweetie and I miss you so much!

Love you,

Friday, January 7, 2011

31 weeks-whining involved

Yes I know that I'm late to posting this, but I'm still in my 31st week so it's okay.

  This week, your baby measures over 16 inches long. He weighs about 3.3 pounds (try carrying four navel oranges) and is heading into a growth spurt. He can turn his head from side to side, and his arms, legs, and body are beginning to plump out as needed fat accumulates underneath his skin. He's probably moving a lot, too, so you may have trouble sleeping because your baby's kicks and somersaults keep you up. Take comfort: All this moving is a sign that your baby is active and healthy. 

I have to laugh at the thought that he weighs about 3.3 lbs...our little porky the pig is estimated at 4lbs 5oz. I'm feeling pretty good, but I have to be honest, this part is getting hard physically. I used to cringe and cry when I would read people complaining about being done at this point, but now I get it. Nugget's cute little punches and kicks are no more and now it feels like he's grabbing organs and rolling to the other side. It's painful. Or else he gets stuck in my ribs or hips and then flairs around trying to get unstuck. At least that's the best way I can describe it.  I love the movement because it lets me know that he's okay, but it still hurts. I'm not ready to be done being pregnant because it's going to be awhile until we have a 3rd and if he were to come now he'd have some NICU time. So universe, do not take this complaining as a sign that I'm done. I want this little boy to keep cooking for 44 more days.

Yes, you read that right. I have 44 days to go until we meet little Nuggy! I had a slight anxiety attack this morning at 2:30 about not having things ready for him.  My shower is on 1/29 so I know I will have more things at that point, but right now I'm freaking out. I was up doing laundry to make sure he had clean clothes. I was very productive, but I'm beat now.  Take a look at the picture below from this morning and you can tell. I had my weekly appt with Dr. B yesterday and she is very optimistic now and was trying to fight back emotions of excitement. She also told me that I look very cute. Seriously, what girl doesn't like that? lol

Okay, here's my crappy picture from this morning. I'll get a better one tomorrow when I'm out with my parents.   

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget!


Sunday, January 2, 2011

March for Babies Auction

Here is a blog post from a very good friend who is doing an auction to raise money for Team Aidan Christopher. If you are crafty and would like to donate please check out her blog.

March for Babies Auction

Are you a business owner? Would you like to advertise your business while supporting a great cause? Please consider donating an item to my auction as I fund raise for Team Aidan and March for Babies!

Marching for Aidan in 2010

On April 30th, 2011 I will be marching in honor and memory of Aidan Christopher (keep reading to learn more about Aidan).  Last year Team Aidan raised over $4,000 for March of Dimes and the goal to prevent premature birth and infant mortality!  My fund raising goal is $200 and in an effort to achieve this I would like to host an auction on my facebook page on a date TBD.  

How it will work:
1.  Make an item to donate to the Team Aidan Auction.  Gift vouchers would be gladly accepted as well! You will not receive any payment for your donation. All auction proceeds will be donated directly to Team Aidan and March for Babies.
2.  Email a picture of the item, the item's description, starting bid for the item, and your contact information to By submitting an email you accept that you will receive no payment for the items you are donating and that you give me permission to use the images you've provided.You also agree to be responsible for shipping your item to the highest bidder.
3.  Once I receive the information on the item you donate, I will post about your participation on my facebook page and your business will be advertised in the newsfeed of my fans. Currently, I have about 1,100 fans so think about how many potential new fans you may get by participating in this auction! 
4.  Your item will be posted in a photo album I create for the auction. Fans will bid on your item and you will be responsible for mailing the item to the highest bidder. The payment for the item will be sent directly to me via paypal and I will then donate all proceeds from the auction in one lump sum to March for Babies and Team Aidan. 

I would like to have at least ten items for the auction or I'm not sure it will be worth while.  Thank you so much for taking the time to consider making a donation to the auction. You have no idea how much it means to me and to Team Aidan!  Read Aidan's story below.

On February 1st, 2010 my friend Maggie went in for her routine 28 week appointment where she was informed that her son, Aidan Christopher, was measuring two and a half weeks behind. After further testing the doctors discovered that there was a problem with the umbilical cord and that Aidan was in distress due to the cord being wrapped around his neck.
Aidan Christopher was born at 4:44 PM via emergency c-section. He fought hard for 8 days but very sadly he suffered from a brain injury that was too much to survive. He went to Heaven on 9 February 2010 and is survived by his grieving family, friends and his dog Snoopy. 
Maggie and Chris promised Aidan that they would do everything they could to help other premature babies. I'm joining their cause and walking in honor and memory of Aidan on April 30 in Seattle, WA.

"Goodnight stars Goodnight air Goodnight noises everywhere." Goodnight Aidan. Forever in our hearts.
Feb1st 4:44pm-Feb 9th 3:05pm
The mission of March of Dimes is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality.


Thank you so much Megan for doing this to help keep Aidan's name alive. It means more to me then I could ever possibly try to explain.

I love you Aidan Christopher...and so do a lot of people


Saturday, January 1, 2011

Sponsor Me at March for Babies!


Well 2010 what can I say? You started off pretty nice. We went to Vegas with our little wiggle tucked safely inside my belly.
Then we took Wiggleman to the AFC Championship game!

Then we our plans changed drastically and our baby Aidan was born.

Our world was flipped upside down with the diagnosis of a massive brain bleed, but we held on to hope for our little fighter.

We said hello and goodbye in 8 short days.
We spent the rest of the year trying to piece our hearts back together. We started off using tape, but that didn't hold very well and soon we realized that there was no magical fix.

In June, we found out that we were expecting baby # 2.

The rest of the year has been filled with sadness, fear, happiness, laughter, anxiety, grief, more laughter and meeting a ton of new people.

2010~ You were the worst year of my life, but more importantly, you were the best. I met my son, got to love on him and care for him. I grew up,was taught to love deeply, laugh at the little things and remember that everyone handles things differently.

Aidan Christopher,
I'm so glad that we got to meet you and to be your parents. I'm sorry we couldn't protect you, but your story and life have touched so many people that I know there was a reason. You are the light of my life and I love you so incredibly much.

Baby boy, I'm so glad you are in our lives. You have given mommy and daddy a lot of hope and happiness. Every little, and now big, kick jab and roll just make us smile. You already have your own little personality and I'm so excited to meet you and get to know you on the outside. I promise that even though we will make mistakes, mommy and daddy will love you forever and protect you to the best of our abilities.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Nugget