Sunday, September 18, 2011

Going to start adding formula

So I've decided to start adding formula to the breast milk. I came to this decision because I'm sick of pumping all the time. I have to pump 6 times a day and I'm just barely making enough. He's now eating 30 oz a day and two full jars of fruits and veggies. Well he should be eating the 2nd jar at home at night, but because of pumping and Chris was out of town I didn't have time. I had to come home, get him down for his pre-bed time nap, pump, make dinner, give him a bottle, bath and then bed. So now I will be pumping at work only during the week and on the weekends I'll be pumping on the same schedule as at work. Then adding formula. This plan will start next weekend. I want Lucas to go 7 months with no formula and since he'll be 7 months on Thursday it's a perfect time to start.

I didn't make this decision lightly. I really struggled with the idea of having to pay for food when right now I make enough for him to eat. Also I felt guilty for stopping when I know so many women who so badly want to breastfeed, but can't. I have to do what's best for my family though. I want to be on the floor playing with Lucas. So starting on Saturday, Lucas will get 1 oz of formula mixed with 4 oz of breast milk and work our way up to half and half.

I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander


Sunday, September 11, 2011

Never Forget

In memory of all of those who lost their lives 10 years ago


I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander

Saturday, September 10, 2011

It's like she knows

Today is a beautiful day. The sun has been shinning off and on, Lucas has been a sweetie today and we spent the day going to garage sales. I couldn't help but think about how much I wanted Aidan to be with us. Not in spirit, but with us. I checked my phone around noon and saw that I had an e-mail from my mom. I needed it and she didn't even know. Well she probably did because she's my mom, but I didn't tell her I need it.

She went to visit my baby and took a picture for me. I hate that my parents have to visit my son at the cemetery, but I'm so glad they do. They always remind me that they miss him. Chris' parents remind me that too by always having a pinwheel there.

Thank you momma for visiting Aidan and for sending me a picture.

I love you Aidan Christopher and I miss you so much!


I love you too Lucas Alexander

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Great way to help an adoption

Check out my friend Amber's blog. She is hosting a t-shirt giveaway to help raise awareness and money for her and her husband to adopt. They are going to adopt siblings from Africa. Seriously, how amazing are these two?

Amber's family is near and dear to my heart. I grew up with her husband (kinda he was a few years ahead of me) brother in law and sister in law. We went to church together. Then I met Amber on that Monday. That Monday where we found out that Aidan wasn't going to survive. That Monday where I rushed to the hospital to discuss options with the dr. That Monday where I sat and cried while holding my baby for the first time. That Monday where Amber became a part of my family. I kept in contact with Amber through face book and I would go visit her on the days that I had support group. Then the day Lucas was born, Amber was in the OR. She took care of my Aidan and now she was going to be one of the first people to take care of my Lucas.

I'm looking forward to the day that Amber writes in her blog that they are going to go get their children.


ps. I love you Aidan Christopher and Lucas Alexander