At the vet, Snoopy just plopped down on the floor. He's a beagle and beagles love to sniff. The vet was amazing. She offered to triage him to try to buy him more time. That would have been great for us, but not for Snoopy. They took us to a nicer more private room and then brought Snoopy in. We just sat there petting him, telling him we love him and to say hi to Aidan for us. I have no idea how much time went by. It could have been a minute or 10, all I know is that it wasn't enough. It would never be enough though. We knew Snoopy knew. He was shaking, it could have been the iv in his arm, and honest to God, a little tear came out. When it was time, I was at eye level with Snoopy with complete eye contact rubbing him. He went quickly. I thought I would have more time, but that's not how the process works. I made a scream that Chris said he hasn't heard since Aidan passed. We just sat there crying and petting him. As I told the vet, I was just expecting him to move his head to look at us. We loved on him and when his body started to get cold, I knew it was time for us to leave. I joked with Chris that we weren't going to stay until 4:44 like we did with Aidan. :-)
We decided to have him cremated. Part of his ashes will be sprinkled over Aidan and the rest will be put in the ground when we plant a bush in our backyard for him. My grieving will be long and difficult, just like it was/is with Aidan. Snoopy was my first baby and he's been my support for the past 12 years. He has loved on me during my worst times and protecting my kids as his own. We will get another dog, at some point, but please don't tell me to "just get another one." We need to be at peace with losing Snoopy and ready to open our hearts again. This is the longest I've ever been without a dog and I'm okay with that for some time. No dog will replace my Snoop and I need to come to terms with him being gone. I still look at the couch for him, I still hold my leg out when I open the door. For crying out loud, literally, I cried in Meijer at the pet section. So give me, us, time please. I'll be writing about our grief on here just as I did with Aidan. I need my feelings to be said.
RIP Snoopy Lawrence H. You are so intensely loved and missed!